When giving someone an IOU, it's best to lay down some ground rules.
Added: 6 months ago
Views: 22,262
Another line of one liners for you guys, and here is what Is the file I created and read f
Another line of one liners for you guys, and here is what Is the file I created and read from, as always, so did not make the cut, and some changed, and lots of spelling errors
Who do you think would win outta the fligingo and the lawn gnomes? I think the gnomes would win, because they can organize, they smoke pipes
I always wondered why they called it the leaning tower of pizza, then I realized, it was leaning towards a pizza shop
You know when you have a dream within a dream...that's trippy
Has someone ever told you that your hair looked like a bush...me either, that'd be rude
The penguins can't fly, I suggest we attach 200 balloons to it so it knows what it's missing
I want a tee shirt, made of t's
Why did the dodo get so popular, what about all the other things that are extinct, I say we give them a chance
Do you think some cavities go to work and say man I hate my job, I wish I was a four leaf clover
My friend was drunk and said that nothing makes sense, I asked him what nothing was
It's like killing two birds with one stone... that's one violent stone
It's raining men!!! Ouch, that would be very painful
I love cheesecake, but I don't love cheese and cake, together
I just found out what movie ratings meant, I always thought they meant G for good, PG for pretty great, PG-13 for Pretty great to the 13 power, and R for pirate speak, which means cool
My girlfriend has a heart of AU, that's gold on the periodic table of elements
The desert is the most formal place there is, not really, but they do have cac tie
Anything you can do I can do better, well I suck at everything thanks for rubbing it in
I'm tired of seeing barley legal on porn sites, I want to see a site that has old women and the tag line is barely alive...no never mind, I don't want to see that
A E I O U and sometime Y because he doen't like to hang out with those fuckers all the time
Rice cakes are some deceiving mothers, they only have rice flower in them
I find that once a pencil loses it's erasher, that you become perfect, because you no longer make mistakes, nope you meant to spell that word wrong
When I was little I colored my butt with highlighter, that's just embarsing, but it was am empisieed butt
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Added: 1 month ago
Views: 14,345
Remember to spay and nuder your pets...oh and to do your laundry too
Added: 9 months ago
Views: 33,671
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Music Composed by Bryce Avary of The Rocket Summer.
Video shot by sumfight.com
Added: 10 months ago
Views: 15,033
This tells how I lost over 100 pounds, hope you can make some use of it
Added: 1 year ago
Views: 299,712
Yes, three of these things in one month, and as always, here is what I jotted down and rea
Yes, three of these things in one month, and as always, here is what I jotted down and read from, some made the list, some didn't and most are spelled wrong :P
Transformers are a great concept, but what about the robots that get stuck with sucky things to turn into...like toilets
Sharpie markers are not that sharp at all man, I tried to kill a man with one, all it gave him was a black neck and in return I got a black eye
As a young child I was often the victim of a kick me sign prank, now that I'm older
I would think lollygagging would not be fun, I mean, who wants to chock on a sucker, especially one of those big ones, god damn
Underwear repair is something I don't find an interest in
The one place you will never see a giraffe is in transvanlia, big neck and vampires do not mix
The squriel is a one food animal, when he's in the flesh, he gathers nuts, when he's a robot he gathers nuts...and probable washers too
A coffee cup is so very versitle, you can drink from it what you want, I myself eat cereal from it, I'm thinking outside the box
I bought a one way ticket to Asia, but had to stop mulitiple times and switch directions, I felt that this ticket of one wayness had lied to me
Everyone is going green nowadays, but no one is as green as the hulk
It's not just people who want what they can't have, I mean look at this dude, the tin man, he wanted a heart in the wizard of oz, scratch that, it's just creepy now that I think about it, dude doesn't even need a heart to live, I think he is just going to...
They say there is an complex algorithm to beat any rubix cube, I didn't relize I knew it even at a young age, pick stickers off and make the sides all one color
They say counting sheep that jump over a fence in a great way to get a good nights sleep, what if that sheep was jumping over a fence and off a cliff, does that still count as a good night sleep, well if you're fucked up in the head it does
In my room I have a
The movie kill bill could have been a little more proper if it wanted, it could have been called kill William I was told in a zombie outbreak that it's not a good idea to run through the city full of zombies with long hair since they could grab you by your hair, after hearing this I said, I don't think it's a good idea to run through a zombie filled city at all, reguardle of your hair situation
Venus fly traps prob have the best get up out of any plant, an insect lands on them either for a rest or if you are a bee to polientate it, then gloomp, not today fucker
Another rude thing you could do is ask a couple who are dancing if you may cut in, then after you hear yes, sure, ect, cut inbetween them with sciussors
Being a disabled spider has to be the worst, it's like, I'm sorry, but you are parlised from the head down...damn!, and also you are blind in your many eyes too...damn damn
If an orange came up to me and said, orange you glad I didn't say bananna, I would respond with, what the fuck, a talking orange, then run away in fear he would defeat me his vitamine c streanght
I feel a little bad for the cherry, he is always on top, I say we let him take a break, from now on the fucking ice cream must be on top, and the ice cream must also provide the condom...yes, that was an ice cream sex joke
Speaking of ice cream, if a naked man busted in my room and said, did some one say ice cream, I would say not here, but point him in the direction of nude beach, there he would find a great life of selling ice cream...damn, this one sucked
Sweet and sour, sour and sweet, no matter how you look at it, at some point with this item, it's going to piss you off, I would like to trade for the sweet and sweet please
Vaccumms have about the worst life, all day they are constently reminded of how hard they suck
My friend said they were going to be shootin the school today, I stayed home, I never made it in the year book that year
I walked into a store with the required shoes and shirt to enter, I was arrested for not wearing any pants, I feel it's bull shit because they didn't say anything about trousers on this sign, from now on please tell me where I can not enter with no pants
All my friends pictures burned up, I t5old her not to wrroy, just think negatives
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Added: 3 weeks ago
Views: 11,707
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