TENKOMORIO‼︎Burn one's bridges MEMORY🏯🌊

I am such a man with a lot of things to do.
I have forgotten my youthful aspirations, and the ideal life plan that shone so brilliantly in my youth has long since collapsed.
I have been living a lazy life, not even realizing it, but recently, sleepless nights have been increasing.
The hourglass of my own life, the backs of my parents growing smaller and smaller in their faraway hometown, and my comrades-in-arms quitting the workforce after having reached the halfway point of their dreams.
All of this drives me to impatience.

Will someone please teach me how to sell?
Will someone please give me a job?
Can someone please introduce me to a legitimate, high-paying part-time job?

If I could only say one word to the innocent me of those days, who still knew nothing, I would say

It wasn't supposed to be like this.

And

I'll do something about it from now on.

I am sorry. Please say two words.